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Monday, April 26, 2010



[hahy-ey-tuhs] Show IPA
–noun,plural-tus·es, -tus.
a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.
Well folks.

It's sort of like this.

There are lots and lots of parents of addicts out here in blogland now. When I first started 10 years or so ago, I was sort of the lone wolf.

I have learned many things through the years. You will too.

I will leave you all with what I have learned.


Sorry guys, but that is the bitter, honest, complete and total truth.

Force them into all the rehabs you can pay for. You are wasting your money.
Give them all the rules you want. They will ignore them.
Give them all the support they can use. It will make no difference.
Trust them all you want, they will rip you off over and over.

I know, I know. These are our babies. Well, they used to be. Now, they are JUNKIES.

Junkies use. Junkies are going to continue to use. Junkies are going to use until either of the following occurs.

1. They die.
2. They go to prison.

And parents? Nothing you do will make any difference. Not love, not support, not networking, not intervention, not forced into Methadone, not suboxone, not one dang thing. Oh, some of them will work short term, but they will relapse again and again and again and again. Eventually.

It's funny. My son-in-law is a recovering alcoholic.

When asked he says "I am an alcoholic", who isn't drinking.

Not one of the junkies I know says "I am a heroin addict" who is not using.

they think if they are clean, it's all good.


Once an alcoholic, always and alcoholic.

Once a junkie, always a junkie.

Guard your hearts, guard your other family members, stop letting the addict suck you dry and TAKE BACK YOUR LIVES.

Continue to pray and hope that God and your child work it out.

if your child dies, I am sorry. If your child decides to get and stay clean, I will rejoice.

Peace be with you.


  1. Oh no, you aren't leaving too?? I have learned so much from your frank and honest comments. I hope you will still read and comment at the very least, but I understand the need to break from the blog. If you do decide to leave for good, you will be so missed and there will be a huge hole in the blogging family. Much peace and love coming your way...Renee

  2. Don't leave! I love your posts. How are the pints doing?

  3. hi·a·tus
       /haɪˈeɪtəs/ Show Spelled[hahy-ey-tuhs] Show IPA
    –noun,plural-tus·es, -tus.
    a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.

  4. Take care! I hope your hiatus is helpful and I hope you and the pints and your DH are doing well! Prayers and hugs!

  5. Many addicts get better. Many do not. Mine has not and neither has yours. All that you say is true. The only thing i am not sure of is if they choose not to stop or if they are just unable. Either way, we must protect ourselves from the torment.

  6. Did I mention that I am going to miss you? I will because you call them like you see them.

    Best wishes,


  7. Que Sera Sera...

    catch you on the flip side, Dawn.

  8. I will miss you. I admit, I've been taken aback by a few things you said but I know that you speak from experience and I have a ton of respect for you. I hope you pop up from time to time like Lou does. Take care of yourself.

  9. Can't wait till your hiatus is over! I have enjoyed and learned a lot from your comments! Hope to see you soon!

  10. Sorry to see you go, Dawn. Hope you'll continue to check in and give us your no bullshit perspective. And, I'm sorry that you have lost all hope for your daughter. I understand that, and know you're just trying to protect yourself. I'm still going to occasionally bug you via email. Enjoy the pints - and take care of yourself. Best, Peggy

  11. Dawn, regardless of how long of a hiatus you take (thanks for the clear definition! LOL), know that you will be missed. I hope the kids continue to do well; and you continue to find peace and joy in your life.

    Your frank and brutally honest comments have helped me more than most. Take care, Lisa

  12. Dawn, you will be missed so much! I hope you still stop in for comments on occasion. I ALWAYS think of you b/c you are strong and honest and caring. You always put me back on track when I'm off in denial land... I heard a saying once at a meeting and thought of you, "She doesn't co-sign on no bull****". You've been very inspirational to me, and I thank you for all your wisdom you've provided to me over the past 6 months. I am going to continue to pray for you, your daughter and the pints (you can go on hiatus, but you can't escape my prayer list!). Love always to you!!! God bless. p.s. great last post before the hiatus, its the most important thing I have to remember daily... Looking forward to when your hiatus is over and you're back posting :)

  13. I have so much appreciated your honesty. Hope for selfish reasons that you hiatus is a short one. You're comments always hit me like a smack-to-the-back-of-the-head. Timed perfectly. Do well.

  14. I just found your blog and would hate to see you stop, I admire your strength and your honesty. It seems like you state just what I need to hear when I need to hear it. Hope you will be back posting soon.
    Take care.

  15. I just happened onto your blog, please don't stop. i want you to know I really needed to hear what you said in your last post. and I miss my daughter.

  16. Your dam right girl! No matter what you say or do your not going to change a dam thing. It is up to the addict and the addict alone.
    Once a junkie always a junkie is the way I see it as well.
    I will ALWAYS be an addict, I just have to take it one day at a time. I can NEVER say that 2years from now I'm going to be here or there and clean, because I just need to take it one day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time!
    stay Up!